It was also the beginning of a string of bad luck – perhaps trauma is a better word – for the frontman when it came to his health, which included getting a fractured skull from a 2015 mugging, being diagnosed with Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy (CTE) and developing a traumatic cataract. The last two were likely knock-on effects of the blunt force trauma from that 2015 attack, but he also managed to separate his rib cage from his chest plate while carrying a Twin Reverb amp “on tour in 2021 or 2022”. He thought he was having a heart attack. Perhaps most scary of all, though, was after he lost his Medicaid coverage in 2020 and had to come off the pills he’d been taking. That had disastrous consequences.
“I was hearing voices,” he describes matter-of-factly. “I thought that there were aliens or demons in my house. But I think it wasn’t because I wasn’t on the medication, I think it was because I was on this medication and got off of it. Because I’ve never had any issues like that before. I had full-on psychosis, schizophrenia, bipolar, anger outbursts over the fucking dishes being in the sink. I was hearing voices, I thought that there were people – like, interdimensional people – trying to come into my house to kill me. This all spawned right after I got that head injury and then I was put on all these different antidepressants and fucking benzos. They had me on so many different medicines, and then they took me off and I was like a bottle rocket whose stick was cut off. I was spinning on the ground, fucking going mental. So I decided then I was going to just lay off mostly everything I could.”
Those effects, thankfully, are in the past. More recently, though, he’s been experiencing essential tremors, a neurological condition that causes uncontrollable rhythmic shaking, usually in the hands. It’s not – he happily demonstrates as he lifts his pint – too bad today, even though drinking does exacerbate it, but it’s yet another issue to add to a long list of unwanted life experience. Needless to say, ever since starting NOTHING, Nicky has always had a lot to write about. But with new, capital letter-less album a short history of decay, he’s putting himself on the line more than ever by writing about a subject he never had the courage to confront before: growing up with an abusive father. Or rather, it wasn’t so much a lack of courage as it was the absence of his physical ability to do so.
“I could barely get out of bed and function before NOTHING,” Nicky explains. “Like, post-prison. So how the fuck am I supposed to write about something like that? But I always wrote a lot of poetry, and I figured there were slick ways that I could write about it. And I try to still write that way, but I could be more vocal about what I’ve been through. I don’t have anything to be ashamed about in my life, I don’t think I’m a piece of shit, I think I’m an alright person that’s always trying to better themselves and do the right thing for the next person. That’s all I really want to be remembered as: someone who got put through a grinder a little, and didn’t let it affect how he felt on the inside.”