In July 2020, when asked to write an article for the Knotfest website promoting the then soon-to-be-released Mariachi El Bronx compilations Música Muerta, Vol 1 and Vol 2, the singer chose to preface his piece with the words “My name is Matt Caughthran and I am a total loser.” In the paragraphs that followed, Matt revealed that in the same week The Bronx raised over $20,000 for the family of Breonna Taylor, a black woman who was shot dead in her Louisville, Kentucky home by three plainclothes police officers in March 2020, he was forced to file for unemployment.
'I’ve never felt so proud and so ashamed,' he wrote, movingly. 'Smiles and cries my friends, smiles and cries.'
"There was probably a three-month stint there in 2020 when I was pretty depressed,” he admits, when the topic is raised, “as far as, like, not really knowing how to handle what was happening, and not really knowing what to do with the kind energy that I was dealing with. I think one of the things that helped me get out of it was that essay.
"Perspective is a super-powerful thing,” he continues. “Here in the States there was so much happening, politically and socially, so it was important to recognise that, but also to give your own life validation: it’s okay to be concerned about yourself and your career and your family and your friends, but it’s also important to not lose sight of the bigger picture, with everyone in the world trying to get through this together. Honestly, it felt good to be vulnerable in that way, and to write about it. We’d been touring for 15 years straight, and then suddenly you’re being left at home to your own devices: wondering who you are outside of being a singer, a musician, an artist, was… an unsettling question for a little bit there. Luckily, I was able to look inward and not be too disgusted (laughs).
"I think everyone went through some sort of existential crisis in 2020. It was a year like no other, but we got out of it relatively unscathed. And actually, we were able to realise how lucky we’ve been to do what we’ve done for the last 18 years. Now we’re excited to be getting back to the community that we missed so much. I’m sure there were moments for all of us where it was like, ‘Shit, what are we gonna do?’ But whatever happens, we adjust, whatever happens, we make it work. The Bronx isn’t going anywhere.
“The Bronx is something we’re extremely grateful for, and don’t ever take for granted. And going through a year with no real ‘normal’ band life, as we know it, only amplified that. This band is something that means so much to us, something we truly value and treasure with all of our hearts. We’ve poured everything we are as human beings into this band, and we’ve gone through a lot: we’ve flipped vans, we’ve lost members, we’ve had and lost a major label deal and put out records by ourselves. There was no way 2020 was going to break The Bronx.”